Important If True 24: Eye Explodes, Brain Expands

[Chris]

Important If True 24:

Eye Explodes, Brain Expands
If a podcast could answer all your deepest questions about existence, would you listen to it? Before you answer, consider this week's conundrums: Does an Amazon shopping algorithm know your own home better than you do? Are meme GIFs contagious, and if so, can they give your hard drive a cold? When a security robot drowns in a mall fountain, is the robot played by Mel Gibson or Joe Pesci? Now, choose. (If you choose incorrectly, a robot will put you in a dumpster.)

Discussed: Resin Pineapple Bookends with Gold Finish, 9.25" Purple Floral Print Terra Cotta Flower Pot, Amazon shenanigans, mall robot alleged suicide, Knightscope security robots, Minority Report, putting your wet phone in rice, putting your wet murdered security robot in rice, Knightscope security robot buddy cop film, robots that smoke, robots that vape, Mel Gibson, Joe Pesci, robot self-awareness, game theory applied to being put in a dumpster, eye explodes, laser comes out, brain expands, CRISPR-based gene meming, E. coli GIF infections, contracting a case of memes, original memester Eadweard Muybridge, beautiful organic data corruption, The Matrix but you're a hard drive instead of a battery, your hard drive catching a cold, Jurassic Park but like with Minions inside DNA or something, frozen meat from heaven, Italian sausage drug deal, Hansen's soda drug deal

And here's that Brian Eno quote Chris haphazardly paraphrased: "Whatever you now find weird, ugly, uncomfortable and nasty about a new medium will surely become its signature. CD distortion, the jitteriness of digital video, the crap sound of 8-bit—all of these will be cherished and emulated as soon as they can be avoided."

Send us your questions at questions@importantiftrue.com. If you enjoyed this and would like to subscribe to an ad-free feed, please consider supporting Idle Thumbs by backing our Patreon.

Chris' Endorsement: Chipmunks songs played at 16rpm (Standouts: Walk Like an Egyptian, Heaven is a Place On Earth, Bettie Davis Eyes, Diamond Dolls, Jessie's Girl

Nick's Endorsement: International Space Station Fly-Through 4K, An Inside Tour of the International Space Station 1080p

Jake's Endorsement: 9.25" Purple Floral Terra Cotta Flower Pot

Sponsored By: Quip electric toothbrushes

 

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[Deadpan]

I can't believe nobody challenges Jake's description of the Knightscope K-3: "It spins around and does basic security stuff."

[DocRandal]

Chris, I had a similar amazon experience. Had dust-free cat litter on subscription for monthly delivery, worked fine for 6 months, then suddenly got the wrong cat litter. Called it in, next day shipping, wrong cat litter. Third time, wrong cat litter and they canceled my subscription. I moved to Chewy for my pet supply needs after that but I can only assume that the storage bin had been filled with the wrong product and the humans aren't paid to check minor changes, they're paid to get product out the door as fast as possible.

 

About the physical robots, watch for algorithm improvements. When the algorithms that control them get better, that's when you need to pay attention. So watch out for amazon never getting an order wrong, I guess.

[DocRandal]

*Cop wakes up, thinks "oh, man, I must be the hospital, good thing my partner Frank took me there. My neck must be messed up, why it it taking so long to turn my head and look at this mirror-*

*sees robot body staring back in mirror, Identity recognition HUD algorithms show "KnightScope Model 1.00.A 99.7% certainty"*

 

IT ME IT ME IT ME IT ME IT ME IT ME IT ME

[DocRandal]

https://www.engadget.com/2017/07/27/miyubi-funny-or-die-jeff-goldblum-vr-feature/

 

It's 1982. A young boy named Dennis has just received the birthday present of his dreams. It's you -- a Japanese robot that can repeat words, although for the most part you watch silently.

 

Miyubi is still enjoyable without the bonus scenes, but you'll be greatly rewarded when you find them. Goldblum appears in the extra, and when you look into his teary eyes as he apologizes for your pain, the show goes from "OK" to "oh, my God." He is your Maker, and he's created a little piece of heaven in your system for you to escape to, because he knew, even as he made you, that you were quickly going to be replaced. In the scene, the Maker wonders aloud if he should call this fantasy world "reality virtualized" or, you know, something like that.

[plasticflesh]

In reply to the speculation on if a robot can know if itself is a robot.

 

This is pretty much the plot to the amazing game SOMA.

[Paul Smith]

Mr. Bungle - None Of Them Knew They Were Robots

 

Spoiler

Mendel's machines replicate in the night
In the black iron prison of St. Augustine's light
He's paying the bills and they're doing him proud
They can float their burnt offerings on assembler clouds

With omega point in the sight
The new Franklins fly their kites
And the post modern empire is ended tonight

 

From history the flood of counterfeits released
The black cloud reductionism and the beast
Automatons gather all the pieces so the world may be increased
In simulation jubilation for the deceased...

 

Spray-on clothes and diamond jaws
Wrinkles smoothed by nanoclaws

 

With my machines I can dispatch you from this world without a trace
Our nostalgia ghosts are ready to take your place

Content-shifting shopping malls
Gasoline trees and walk-through walls
 
(None of them knew...)

 

I feel the grey goo boiling my blood
As I watch the dead rise up out of the earth
Try to hide from the lies as they all come true

 

Deus absconditus
Deus nullus deus

Deus nisi deus

 

I feel the grey goo boiling my blood
As the fenris wolf slowly bites through his chain
Try to hide the myth as it becomes a man

 

(None of them knew...)

 

Buying an X or an O
In statecraft tic-tac-toe
Cat's game for Joe Blow

Post industrial bliss
A binary hug or kiss
Can be wrung from utility mist

They stole the great arcanum
The secret fire
Moloch found his gold for the new empire
Once again
The necrophage becomes saint
 
Lindy hop around the truth
(Jump back wolf pack attack)
Swingin' up there in the noose
(Slap back white shark attack)

 

Phased array diffraction nets
From full-wall paint-on TV sets
Migratory home sublets
And time shared diamond fiber sets

Recombinant logos keys
Bitic Qabalistic trees

 

I feel the grey goo boiling my blood
As leviathan and his bugs freeze the sea
Try to save the world by immolating myself

 

From history
The flood of counterfeits released
The black cloud
The resurrection of the deceased
Automatons gather all the pieces
So the world may be increased
In simulation jubilation
For the builders
Of the body of the beast

 

[Jake]

Oh man, I listened to California on loop for way too long when it was new.

[TychoCelchuuu]

Haha, Chris's recommendation is awesome. I've only listened to Jessie's Girl and Mr. Tambourine Man so far and they're both great.

[Nappi]

Chipmunkson16speed is amazing. I love how thick and brutal the sound gets when the songs are slowed down. I feel that bands like Electric Wizard and Sleep would very much approve of the soundscape of My Sharona.

[goldfish]

honestly, i just really want a terracotta flower vase

[Paul Smith]

6 hours ago, Jake said:

Oh man, I listened to California on loop for way too long when it was new.

I just spent a half hour trying to find a review of a live show I wrote around that time on alt.music.mr-bungle but I think now I must've written it on the Caca Volante fan page's mailing list, long dead.

[SecretAsianMan]

I've also had a similar Amazon experience, except I kept receiving ties instead of vases.

 

The fix wet electronics with rice thing is a popular half-truth.  Dry rice is not a very effective desiccant and people have done trials with other things that work far better.  Even leaving it out in the open to dry can be more effective.

[TimOfTheYear]

Listened to this episode on the way to work this morning and found this sitting in Slack when I got there: 

 

Kalashnikov’s new autonomous weapons and the “Terminator conundrum”

[RubixsQube]

Hey, everyone that puts your phone in rice when it gets wet:

 

why are you doing that, who told you to do that, why did you think that was a thing that would actually work

 

A few months ago my gf dropped her iPhone 6 partially in some water, and we just went and opened the phone up and and carefully dried the insides. I cannot believe that rice would like, pull the moisture out from some components buried deep in a phone. Also, the issue with water getting into the phone is that if you don't actually dry it off from the internal components they will slowly corrode them, and rice ain't doing anything to help there. 

 

 

[richardco]

This is one of the best episodes so far. Right up there with Ghosts 'N Goblins and the 45 brains.

[Gormongous]

I love that the other Thumbs' teasing of Nick's gruff, laconic delivery invariably shades into a Nixon impression at some point. And, you know, it's not far off? I'm almost certain that the sentiment of "You won't have Nixon to kick around anymore" has been voiced by Nick a few times in the several runs of Idle Thumbs.

 

 

Also, Jake, tiny niggle, but 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit isn't the ideal ambient temperature for the human body, despite being the ideal temperature of the human body. Mammals maintain a high internal temperature to maximize the efficient functioning of their biological processes and rely on a cooler external environment to bleed off the excess heat. Efficiency of medium matters a lot, which is why air that's 75 degrees feels pleasant but water that's 75 degrees feels chilly, but all things being equal, according to this paper that I found with a quick Google, thermoneutral external temperature for a naked human at rest is 80.6 degrees Fahrenheit. Now, we're rarely naked or at rest, so room temperature is usually pegged in the mid-seventies, but there you go.

[infamous space turtle]

Sweet cast, I brought a gif

 

 

 

 

[Jake]

2 hours ago, Gormongous said:

Also, Jake, tiny niggle, but 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit isn't the ideal ambient temperature for the human body, despite being the ideal temperature of the human body. Mammals maintain a high internal temperature to maximize the efficient functioning of their biological processes and rely on a cooler external environment to bleed off the excess heat.

 

Oops yes I know that, sorry for misspeaking. 98.6° F would be a very strange ambient air temperature to expect a human to comfortably live in! Thanks for doing the cursory looking into what an actual ideal temperature is.

[Jake]

33 minutes ago, infamous space turtle said:

Sweet cast, I brought a gif

 

 

 

 

 

Microscopic cheese wheel on microscopic bady includes microscopic babby.

[Joshy_]

I don't know why, but from Chris' recommendation, Venus is the song I keep listening to by the 16 speed Chipmunks, it sounds slightly demonic.

[Goose Malloy]

I have a much less informative tiny niggle but for what it's worth Dalek is pronounced with the first syllable rhyming with 'far' and not 'day'.

[Jake]

27 minutes ago, Goose Malloy said:

I have a much less informative tiny niggle but for what it's worth Dalek is pronounced with the first syllable rhyming with 'far' and not 'day'.

 

Oops I used to know that (after saying it incorrectly for years) but it's been a long time since I really watched or thought about Dr Who, so I backslid.

[Xealot42]

Hmm, I just noticed that my Zune software is refusing to download this episode! (as a true J. Allard follower I still do all of my podcast listening on my 120GB Zune)

 

Upon closer inspection, the most recent episodes of Designer Notes and Idle Weekend refuse to download as well. My Waypoint and Giant Bomb podcasts are still downloading fine, so it seems to be limited to Idle Thumbs hosted podcasts.

 

As an experiment I tried subscribing to the Idle Book Club and all episodes refused to download. Subscribing to a random NPR podcast seemed to work fine.

 

Have there been any changes to how podcasts are hosted/delivered recently that might cause issues with Zune software?

[Jake]

@tabacco I'm paging you to this. My guess is because of some http/https stuff we changed lately but I'm not sure. 

 

Very sad sad to hear zune compatibility has broken.