Jake Posted August 23, 2005 (edited) Extra! Wuxtry! Missling link between Dork J Allard and Faux Hipster J Allard discovered by Remo! Full story below: Microsoft's J Allard's extreme transformation Has been discussed at length. I mean, when a crazy spokesman/engineer guy goes from this: to this: ... it's unsettling. People guessed the change might have been overnight, due to the complete out of control ridiculousness of the whole thing, but intrepid video game journalist Chris Remo has stumbled across a rare photo of J Allard in mid-transformation! Observe: Could This Be the Missing Link in the Evolution of J Allard? Only time and further study will tell. Major Christian groups have already issued statements claiming the "missing link" Allard photo is false, and was created electronically to test our faith. Microsoft has refused to comment. J Allard has refused to stop shaving his head and dressing like a weirdo an awesome. http://www.gamasutra.com/php-bin/news_index.php?story=6286 Edited March 5, 2009 by Chris Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chris Posted August 23, 2005 I was as shocked as anyone! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jake Posted August 23, 2005 Walter said: Dressing like a weirdo? More like, awesome! Fixed. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Intrepid Homoludens Posted August 23, 2005 J. Allard was fixed? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
netmonkey Posted August 23, 2005 Lies! the evolution of J Allard is too complex to be made by man; some supernatural being had to help with the evolution. You see, it's all part of this intelligent design that bla bla bla... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miffy495 Posted August 23, 2005 I just think the guy gets way more fucking attention than is healthy. Not even dressing that awesome deserves the press attention that man gets. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chris Posted August 23, 2005 I was talking to Jake the other day and I came to the conclusion that Allard, Kutaragi, and Iwata need their own sitcom. These fucking guys, they're like the three stooges of the video game industry and yet are also three of its most powerful figures. Allard would be the not-as-suave-as-he-thinks guy with a big ego, Kutaragi would be the easily-angered smart one with no social graces, and Iwata is the lovable goofball who never quite knows what's going on. I mean, that's what they already are, someone might as well film them in the same room. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spaceship789 Posted August 23, 2005 Chris said: Allard would be the not-as-suave-as-he-thinks guy with a big ego, Kutaragi would be the easily-angered smart one with no social graces, and Iwata is the lovable goofball who never quite knows what's going on. That would be awesome as the IdleThumbs resident comic strip! BTW great photographic discovery! What we do know is that the change happened quite suddenly. He packed on quite a few pounds after the "I'm jason alexander xbox mechanic" photo, and then pow he changed. You could have caught the inbetween bit. Maybe he still wears those clothes today? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jake Posted March 5, 2009 Before and after re-discovered, four years later: Before: Missing Link: After: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ThunderPeel2001 Posted March 5, 2009 I can't believe they replaced that poor guy with a weird looking android from the 80s... Seriously, that cannot be the same person. Edit: Sure this is the missing link? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SignorSuperdouche Posted March 6, 2009 I wish he'd stayed as the podgy, balding, dorky J Allard. He actually looked pretty cool in a geeky kind of way. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ThunderPeel2001 Posted March 6, 2009 Definitely. Geeky looking, but at least human. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
n0wak Posted March 6, 2009 Wow. 2005? I'm having a flash back to my mid 20s. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OssK Posted March 6, 2009 It's not the missing link, there was no such thing as an evolution of J Allard he was touched by our lord who said "and thou shalt fuck them all in the asst with thou consolst for satan luciferum diabolicum ist tryingst tost bringst teh y3ar of teh PS3 onto thine world...st." and so J Allard came and brought forth the Xbox. Fear not my brother for they Idlethumbers have been found guilty of practicing with the Photoshop they have! Burn the switch! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
brkl Posted March 6, 2009 J Allard just prior to his disappearance: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Scrobbs Posted March 6, 2009 Frank Sobotka J Allard Sir, I've heard rumours that J Allard has been moonlighting as the treasurer of the International Brotherhood of Stevedores in Baltimore. Can this be true? I think we should be told! Yours etc. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gdf Posted March 6, 2009 SignorSuperdouche said: I wish he'd stayed as the podgy, balding, dorky J Allard. He actually looked pretty cool in a geeky kind of way. He looked like a Microsoft employee. The horrific creature that replaced him should have been shot whilst he was still in the (gaming) public's eye. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marek Posted March 7, 2009 J Allard gives this thread the secret slightly rotated thumbs up: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sergey Posted March 8, 2009 > Colin Mochrie to Moby? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ThunderPeel2001 Posted March 10, 2009 It's all making sense!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OssK Posted March 10, 2009 I don't know if it makes sense but every single post of this thread made me wet my pants in laughter... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ThunderPeel2001 Posted March 10, 2009 I hope you didn't read it all in one go and are subsequently "ankle deep". Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OssK Posted March 10, 2009 Nope but it did cost me quite a lot of pants. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites