Grand Thumb Auto XXVII: Neo Grand Metal Theft Genesis Nova Pink

[toblix]

The date is Tuesday, May 19th. The time is 21:00 GMT. The game is GTA IV. The mode is Cops & Robbers, at least a couple of times.

[Nachimir]

[miffy495]

Unfortunately out this week, chaps. Girlfriend is celebrating the anniversary of her birth, and my attendance is required.

[Wrestlevania]

The freelance job from hell I agreed to continues to take great delight in putting on very large boots, walking through broken glass, then stomping my groin repeatedly.

Meaning I very likely won't be along this week (again). Unless it's to help facilitate a nervous breakdown, which will probably be even more embarrassingly hilarious than when I've had a couple of pints of vodka and orange during Left 4 Dead...

[James]

I might not be able to make it this week either, depending on whether I decide I value friends I've had since school over some morons I kind of know over the Internet. So it's pretty much 50/50.

when I've had a couple of pints of vodka and orange during Left 4 Dead...

Hey, it wasn't until yesterday that I realized this week's outcome was pretty much the opposite of last week's.

[Wrestlevania]

Hey, it wasn't until yesterday that I realized this week's outcome was pretty much the opposite of last week's.

Of course--after I shot you in the head for trying to get on my helicopter.

So, the moral of this story is: don't drink and game. It makes no significant difference and you'd be better off saving for more RAM (or something).

[Nevsky]

The date is Tuesday, May 19th. The time is 21:00 GMT. The game is GTA IV. The mode is Cops & Robbers, at least a couple of times.

I think I should be free for some Grand Theft Action tonight. What should I do? Should I add you as a friend on live, toblix?

[toblix]

Sure. You should really add everyone else in this thread too, so you can see who's online tonight. If I don't make it, maybe someone else does.

[James]

Yeah, go ahead and add me, too. I won't interact with you at all outside of the GTA games, which I never initiate anyway, but it'll make us both feel more popular.

(That's not sarcastic, by the way. I just work on the assumption that everyone else is busy unless they specifically contact me.)

[Wrestlevania]

Yeah, busy laughing at you.

[toblix]

(That's not sarcastic, by the way. I just work on the assumption that everyone else is busy unless they specifically contact me.)

I do that too.

[Nevsky]

OK, I've added a couple of you - thanks for saying it's ok, Toblix and JamesM. Don't worry, I won't bother you outside of Thumb-sanctioned recreation.

Might be able to get a game or two in tonight. I do have some work to get on with, but some free time should come up.

[James]

I AM POSTING WHILE PLAYING I AM SO AWESOME

[toblix]

That is awesome. Wow. Now my post-game post will appear totally lame.

[James]

Don't worry, I won't bother you outside of Thumb-sanctioned recreation.

I wouldn't actually mind. I'm just saying that it never ever happens.

[Wrestlevania]

I must say, that was jolly good fun. I particularly enjoyed the part where I slowly ground TheJamesM to a paste, using my trusty bin lorry.

The "far blips only" setting for deathmatches also made things much more fruity and exciting. I approve of your meddling with established formulae, 'blix. :tup:

[Nachimir]

I found far blips very , and that last race course was way too long - it just separated us all by miles.

Great fun as ever though, the smaller more chaotic races are brilliant

[James]

I was disappointed that I didn't get a chance to pull off my pinning manoeuvre (though I came close a couple of times), but there was a sufficient degree of harassment to make it all worthwhile.

[Nachimir]

Oh yes, did I hear you asking if it was possible to do it to someone while they were in the water?

Knocking Toblix' fire engine into the water between us was pretty good fun. That happened because I missed a checkpoint and had to head back down the runway to get it, and thought I might as well ram people on the way

[James]

I think you might have.

We actually teamed up on at least a couple of occasions (didn't you knock someone down before I finished them off?), now that I think about it. Does this mean we're getting married soon? Or are we just a crime-fighting duo, except what we're fighting isn't crime? And also I fight you?

Yeah, Grand Thumb Auto is pretty great.

[Nachimir]

We're a crime-committing duo

...but way better than Kayne and Lynch.

[toblix]

More like a couple of fags but whater your'e cool.

[Wrestlevania]

That last race course was way too long - it just separated us all by miles.

I've been thinking about this...

I think the trick to setting up a good "GTA Race" game is to choose a track that's suitable for the vehicle class you're going to use.

For instance, the ice-cream trucks work best on the heavily populated urban courses - regardless of circuit length - that have good straights but also tight turns. Because the Mr Tastys handle so badly, busy urban routes mean players are liable to overshoot turns, crash or get stuck amongst other vehicles quite often. This gives players lagging behind or recovering from previous mishaps a chance to easily get back in the running. Or casually grenade a fellow back-marker into oblivion--often several times over. Eh, James..?

Conversely, if we're racing something like sports cars then a higher number of laps on short, fast courses that intersect themselves are best. Even if the field gets split up, for whatever reason, being in fast cars and constantly crossing back and forth over the same short stretch of road still gives you plenty of opportunity for mirth. And racing, because super-fast cars like the unFerraris and notLambourghinis make it easy to catch up if things go awry for you.

Anyway, just my observations and feelings on Grand Thumb Auto (seeing as we've been playing almost every week for many months now). Feel free to ignore entirely.

[Nevsky]

Very enjoyable evening!

I agree about far blips being a bit .

The set up created some hilarious moments of madcap jumpiness with the smaller level and the rockets, but the other time/s, when the map was a little more spread out, and contained more pedestrians and cars, I spent more time trying to find people than anything else.

My highlight was getting jacked in my fire truck. Or going in for haphazard potenti-kills with the knife after running out of rockets.

[toblix]

I sort of tried to mix it up a bit last night. I find that the whatever the fuck it's called figure eight track where we raced sports cars is awesome almost regardless of which vehicle you choose.

I also tend to set traffic to max, because I think the racing gets more interesting when you're dodging other cars and pileups are more likely to happen. Unfortunately I tend to choose the same tracks all the time. I mean the airport is a given, and more of a ritual, but I think fire truck racing could also be fun on a lot of other track too, as well.

Fig. 1 Diagram of various shit

So we have these races we always pick:

• Airport
  
• Exhaust Fumes (the one that takes place almost exclusively on the raised highway)
  
• The one where you race on the highway all the way to the end, and then up a ramp and turn, and then back almost all the way and do a little loop around a couple of gas stations.
  

There are a bunch of others we haven't tried. If I host the game next time I'll be sure to be crazy and unpredictable in my choice of tracks. If not, I hope whoever hosts will also be that too. As well.

"But although all our knowledge begins with experience, it does not follow that it arises from experience." -Immanuel Kant

Also, I find autoaim on to be the only way. It's a bit weird because I like driving and autoaim does nothing when you're in a car, but the few times I'm on foot I like not having to concentrate on following the dude with the crosshair. It's almost like two different game modes. Also, do we always need to have the rocket wars on Charge Island? No, we fucking do not. Peace out.

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1. Kübler-Ross, On Death and Dying 45–60.

2. "IEEE Editorial Style Manual". IEEE.org. 2007. http://www.ieee.org/portal/cms_docs_iportals/iportals/publications/authors/transjnl/stylemanual.pdf. Retrieved on 2008-02-08.